


Dreams are for sleepers

by raininggoldfish



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Choi Seungcheol | S.Coups being an Asshole, How Do I Tag, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Insomnia, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Minor Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Lee Seokmin | DK, Poor Life Choices, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Why Did I Write This?, jihoon is selectively mute, this got dark hella fast
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2017-12-28
Packaged: 2019-02-22 20:15:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13174401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raininggoldfish/pseuds/raininggoldfish
Summary: 'Dreams are for sleepers, but you're a believer - not a dreamer'[i'll warn you now there are some serious topics in this fic that may affect readers in different ways. readers read at their own discretion and i in no way encourage the romatasicing of any mental illness]





	1. Chapter 1

>  SEUNGCHEOL: morning blues

No memories of ever falling asleep that night came crashing down on Choi Seungcheol as he pondered his night, but his alarm was screaming at him, demanding he rise from his safe haven of a bed. From what Seungcheol could infer from his position of half lying on his bed and half falling off head first was that he was still wearing his crisp, freshly laundered shirt and the most disgusting shade of luminescent, neon purple he had been given for his birthday, now creased enough to hide a small country in its crevices, along with a mismatched pair of grey and orange socks and what he hoped to simply be his boxers on back to front. The sight would have been something humorous to witness had Seungcheol been stood before a group of his peers, however he was still in his king sized bed with his bed covers pulled to his chin, contemplating abandoning his bed to relieve his bladder which was evidently too full to keep its contents contained for much longer.

Eventually, he succumbed to the will of his bladder and somehow found himself in his bathroom, three doors down the hall from his bedroom and somehow without the feeling of his head being filled with cotton wool. This conclusion of surprise stemmed from from what would have looked like the 22-year-old man flaring his arms like a four-year-old and tripping over his own feet in a haste to reach the room of his desired task, but felt like Seungcheol had, in fact, just sprinted nine half marathons and completed a triathlon. With his main task of the morning completed, Seungcheol chose to take his chances at glancing at his reflection in his second hand, hand-me-down mirror given to him by a relative he would never remember the name of when it mattered.

In the mirror something similar to Seungcheol stared back at him, they had the same face but Seungcheol didn't recognise the man staring back at him with lifeless eyes. Mirror Seungcheol had sunken eyes coloured a lifeless grey. Mirror Seungcheol was pale and all too thin. Mirror Seungcheol's skin was plate, almost translucent and grey looking like he hadn't eaten or slept within last the last decade. Black rings also enclosed Mirror Seungcheol's eyes, reminding anyone who met him of a panda. Those eyes bore the tell tale signs of someone losing a one sided battle everybody ignore. 

Something akin to fear began to seep into Seungcheol's head, whispering to him, making him believe the wrong things about himself, his family and the world around him. In a haste to scare away the monster trying to befriend Seungcheol, the man made an over dramatic attempt to splash his face with freezing cold water. The water made his skin tingle - burn if you would but it was what he needed to pull him out of his thoughts and back into the real world. Today Seungcheol really needed to have his head on straight, game in tack and words in order if he was going to be able to land the trade deal with some CEO of some tech company he wasn't interested in meeting, but sadly, Seungcheol works for a family run business and that's how the world works sadly.

The idea of work sent Seungcheol's head spinning and stomach just so happened to do the same. The result wasn't a pleasant one as he stared at the substance decorating the bowl of his once pristine looking toilet. The site made him feel even more queasy but with all the coffee he had already drank decorating his toilet he sighed and moved on with his day, even if he wanted it to end so badly.

* * *

> JIHOON: and 'the not morning person'

Lee Jihoon honestly could not give two fucks if there was an earthquake happening currently, he was not happy with the human embodiment of sunshine pulling his six blankets off his tiny body and throwing open his curtains with a 'rise and shine baby demon, you have a shift to start in half an hour'. Seokmin may be able to get up at the ass crack of dawn to water plants and sign song or whatever hippy shit he was into but Jihoon wasn't a morning person and was about ready to murder Seokmin, if that's what you would call a 21-year-old no taller than his 14-year-old nephew attempting to kick his roommate in the shin. Another few seconds later Seokmin exited the room, reminding the shorter male he needed to be ready to go as soon as possible if he wanted a lif to work.

Sadly, Jihoon needed the ride to work because the idea of having to get on a bus with other people and communicate made him feel physically sick. So in the record smashing time of 5 minutes, Jihoon was perched on the back of the decade old, second hand leather sofa he and Seokmin had owned since they were in college as roommate. Jihoon was dressed like any adult looking child could, in a pair of jeans he hadn't washe din a week and a jumpers big enough to fit Seokmin in too. Seokmin halted by the door to the living room, raising an eyebrow at Jihoon who was sipping the coffee that had been left out for him in the mug his mother had brought him for a birthday he couldn't, nor wanted, to remember.

There was always something that stuck out in Seokmin's mind was Jihoon's wardrobe choices. Everything was always long sleeve for the past year and a half. It made Seokmin too curious for his own good knowing there was something written in cursive on his roommate's wrist. Jihoon would never show Seokmin that his wrist said 'why is there a child working in a coffee shop? Shouldn't you be in school or do you think you're better than half the population of school aged children who have to pay millions to get into high class schools to make it in this world?', it was embarrassing enough to even know it was there, let alone share it.

"Come on, traffic is going to be hectic." Seokmin commented, opening the front door for Jihoon who walked past silently, glancing up at Seokmin and giving him a facial expression that someone may describe as trying to smile at someone you would love nothing more than to stab in the eye - it was actually Jihoon saying thank you to the younger for opening the door for him.

Jihoon's job was as simple as brushing his teeth. He glared at annoying officer workers, took their cash and in return he gave them ground dirt to drink from a coffee machine that had seen better days in the jurassic era. Some days he got smartass comments off people and some days Jihoon was giving out the smartass comments. What was written on the inside of his arm just goes to show how much the world really thinks of him but it doesn't matter to him.

* * *

> JIHOON: the man in the window

His wrist was beginning to get irritating, the skin dyed with hurtful words itched like he had dragged it through a nettle bush, driving him past the brink of sanity and into the equivalent emotion of iritence as he waited patiently for the first customers of the morning to walk into the sad and underappreciated Soyeon Teacup Coffee Shop. The Coffee shop was small and yet big, decorated with reclaimed wood and artifacts that belonged in a museum of boringness rather than a coffee shop that sold overpriced coffee for cups tasteless, liquid dirt. Jihoon was a tea drinker by nature and Coffee was disgusting but working a cash register was easy enough.

Opposite Jihoon were two glass door that required pushing to be opened, through them jihoon could see the world turn as he sat on his stool at the cash register contemplating everything from the sounds of bird song to a movie he watched 4 years ago. Today he saw two men, on short and plum with blond hair slicked back with too much hair gel and a round nose in a plum coloured suit talking a man considerably younger, with hair to match the colour of his shirt, a pale grey that brought out the brown flecks in his sunken eyes. Jihoon watched them approach the Coffee shop, deep in a conversation he dreaded to be happening.

The two men entered, gracefully making their way up to the counter and musing over the overpriced dirt on sale. the man in the plum suit ordered first, a green tea and two eclairs punctuated with a hearty laugh. Jihoon complied sadly with the order and left his station to brew the antique kettle kept only because Jihoon had thrown a hissy fit at his boss about having to make tea in a coffee machine which ruined the flavour of the drink. While the kettle boiled and hissed like most things do past their prime Jihoon bagged the last two eclairs and placed them on the work surface before the round man.

A sentence forced its way in jagged pieces out of Jihoon's mouth sounding hoarse from lack of use, "Take a seat, two minutes." Was all he could force out before retreating back into his shell to protect himself with a glare.

When he turned to the other man the words that flew out his mouth cut Jihoon like knives might have. "Why is there a child working in a coffee shop? Shouldn't you be in school or do you think you're better than half the population of school aged children who have to pay millions to get into high class schools to make it in this world?" Jihoon choked almost hearing the word come out a strangers mouth that were edged into his wrist. Jihoon froze, his demeanour broken.

Seconds later the kettle hissed like a serpent raising from its slumber, demanding it be removed from its source of thermal energy. Jihoon jumped, bashing his knee off the shelf in front of him, a silent cry of pain filling the coffee shop as jihoon limped a few steps towards the kettle, completely ignoring the man with the grey hair and sad, sunken eyes as he poured the tea for the jolly gentleman, giving him a rare smile.

What followed surprised Jihoon because he hadn't commanded his limbs to do so but he turned around to the new customer and glared at him, he stepped as close as he could to the customer and rolled the sleeve of his jumper up to his elbow and gently thrust his right wrist towards the taller stranger. He hoped that he got his message across when he tapped his wrist and the man's eyes widened.

"I think I'll have an iced americano." He didn't even use any manners.

* * *

> SEUNGCHEOL: someone else

Shock had leaked into Seungcheol's body like the cold. His 'soulmate' was stood before him with eyes that screamed angry and a name badge that read 'woozi'. After realising how much of an asshole he had been he ordered the cheapest thing he had seen on the menu and scampered off like a wounded puppy with its tail between its legs to where Mr Seo was sat, scoffing his eclairs like an uneducated pig. Seungcheol slipped into the booth opposite Mr Seo and rolled his left sleeve back to reveal a few simple words that secretly kept him living every day - even if he didn't believe in soulmates.

'Dreams are for sleepers, but you're a believer - not a dreamer.'

Seungcheol let the feeling of surprise crawl under his skin until his mind began to wonder back to the thoughts of the morning and he began to feel his face age again. His reflection in the window of the coffee shop was Mirror Seungcheol with his panda eyes, grey skin and lifeless future. His doctors had told him it was depression he had, the feelings of complete numbness, nothingness and sadness consumed his life. Seungcheol was in no way suicidal, he just reached the point in life where nothing mattered. Some days he just simply lay in bed with nothing to do and wanting to do nothing, on a bad day he would sleep all day and drink all night but he was still going, working and living - even if his attempt at life was shitty but did life come with a manual?

Mr Seo glanced at Seungcheol with concern. His eyes raked over Seungcheol's face for any sign the younger male was ok. "Seungcheol? Are you ok?" Seungcheol recoiled from the man. "I'm fine Mr Seo," He paused contemplating asking Mr Seo for advice, "I, I just think I may have met my soulmate?"

* * *

> SEOKMIN: the translations

Seokmin poked his head out the back room of Soyeon's Teacup Coffee Shop to check on Jihoon when he noticed the older male rearranging the coffee cups on the work surface over and other again while the ancient coffee machine screamed like a air raid siren from the second world war. The thing about JIhoon was when he was upset in anyway he had the habit of moving things around, organizing things and starting all over, it was a tick that helped him calm down when he could voice his frustrations verbally. "Jihoon, what's wrong?" Seokmin asked as he flicked a switch on the coffee machine and it stopped screeching at the inhabitants of the coffee shop. Jihoon's hands waved about in the air, making various gestures and signs while he facial expression changed, anger and frustration mixing with sadness and sympathy.

_I have an asshole for a soulmate, doesn't understand the meaning of manners and I'm worried he hasn't slept in the last week_

Sympathy rested on Seokmin's face as he glanced at the only two customers they had. He noticed how the taller of the two was in a far off world, looking ready to nod off. "Grab his coffee and let's go talk to him."

* * *

>  SEUNGCHEOL: the reality

"Here's your coffee." A smile handed the plastic cup to Seungcheol and took a slight step back revealing the black haired male from earlier who Seungcheol assumed he had insulted because when he looked at him now he realised he was certainly much older than what he had taken him for in the beginning. "Thank you." Seungcheol attempted as best he could to fake a smile. Next were a thousand million hand gestures Seungcheol didn't understand from the black haired male but the smile man seemed to understand perfectly.

_I'm Jihoon and you seem like a complete asshole_

It was blunt but true and seokmin had the responsibility of translating it to Seungcheol even though Mr Seo beside him looked utterly disgusted. Awkwardly, Seungcheol flushed and looked away.

_Do you want to talk somewhere else_


	2. Chapter 2

A year passed easily, mostly containing Jihoon yelling at Seungcheol through Seokmin about his lack of personal care and not quite dates that Seokmin had insisted on which mostly consisted of Seokmin dropping the pair off at a museum or some other building neither wanted to be in. Jihoon stopped taking his roommate everywhere with him as a sign language translator and chose to instead teach Seungcheol basic signs and began instinctively carrying writing implements with him so as to express his thoughts. Seungcheol was still soft spoken with jagged words and didn't recognise himself in the mirror but learned to show genuine care for Jihoon - at least he could consider Jihoon a friend by now.

Jihoon moved in with Seungcheol before anyone knew it and Seokmin would visit on weekends with his boyfriend of the last few years, Joshua, who had always mothered Jihoon more than necessary. Seungcheol still stayed awake until the early hours of the morning, only now he did it because there was a gentle beauty to the younger man he insulted the first time he met. In his sleep Jihoon lost all his anger, his expression was placid and relaxed. Envy embedded itself in the heart of Seungcheol when he watched the younger sleep, tucked away to himself because even when asleep Jihoon kept his walls up.

On one particular night, Seungcheol couldn't find sleep in his dark apartment. Sleep evaded him, mocking his tiredness by revoking his right to sleep. It was in this darkest moments that slowly his memories came back to him. The smile that had grace Jihoon's lips on his birthday when he had bestowed the small gift of a photo of the pair at a park Seokmin had dragged them to, the look of amazement in his family's eyes when he explained to them about his soulmate being a bitter 90-year-old in a 20 year old's body - he told a joke that day, and finally the thought of that morning came to mind. Mirror Seungcheol no longer had sunken, lifeless eyes or nearly translucent skin, Mirror Seungcheol now had brown eyes that held smiles and he was eating better than he had in a long time. He was still having his ups and downs but he was _happy_ , he was finally ok.

The conclusion brought his attention to the wet patch on his pillow forming in an abstract crescent moon shape, smiling back up at him. The tears were falling faster than Seungcheol had chance to process them. A soft head of black hair lifted from its place on the baby blue pillow slip, Jihoon's eyes rose to meet Seungcheol's, the pleasant confusion of being half asleep and worry mixed on Jihoon expression as one of his hands softly reached out to wipe the tears slipping down the older man's face. His eyes held an unspoken question: what's wrong? Seungcheol's laughter mixed softly with his tears as he gently wrapped his longer fingers around Jihoon's writs. 

"I'm happy Jihoon, so happy." He whispered closing his eyes with a soft smile, "You make me feel happy."

Seconds or hours may have passed before Seungcheol spoke again, still ensnaring Jihoon's wrist in his hand as the clock on their bedroom wall pushed time forward. A waterfall of realisation came crashing down on the older man as he lay beside the man labeled his soulmate. It was _their_ clock, _their_ bedroom, _their_ apartment. Time had brought them together and entwined everything they owned together. Seungcheol was no longer living his own life but sharing it with the black haired man with his angry eyes and pink flannel pajamas lying beside him. Now that he thought back on everything that had ever happened in his life it was leading up to the moment they met.

Seungcheol chose to attend college because he saw an advert on the side of a bus. The same bus Jihoon had been on with his family when they moved to the big city. Seungcheol pursued his family run business career because his family had hired a new head of marketing, a man until a few days ago he hadn't know was Jihoon's father. The day the pair had met Seungcheol and Mr Seo in his plumb suit were planning on heading straight for the subway and making their way to Mr Seo's business complex but as the were about to enter the subway station the realisation of not having any morning sugars hit Mr Seo in the face like a train. The jolly man in his jolly plumb suit suggested they eat - leading them into Soyeon Teacup Coffee Shop.

Gently, Seungcheol pulled Jihoon's had towards his lips and pressed a kiss to each of his knuckles, a show of affection rare with Seungcheol even when the pair were alone. The tears had stopped by now but Jihoon still found himself lost in confusion, fearing what had been the last year a lie and Seungcheol's hurricane of blinding and too good to be true lies would shater and bring Jihoon back into the real world. Fear pulsed through the shorter males veins, telling him he should keep away from Seungcheol, restack his walls and keep himself safe but his heart was screaming at him, telling him everything was real and he had experienced the reality of the past year, that the man laying beside him did care for him and not the words scribbled into his wrist.

"Jihoon, it seems I'm falling for you. I have no dreams left to fulfil it seems." Seungcheol admitted shily, hiding his face bashfully in his pillow like a schoolgirl with a crush. Jihoon gave him a soft smile and caressed his cheek with his free hand, everything they had been doing since Jihoon had woken up was something they normally did. Seungcheol would've hidden his tears, Jihoon would've felt guilty and it would never be mentioned again out of embarrassment. The smile was rare and comforting, telling Seungcheol he wasn't alone anymore, he would feel numb anymore.

Jihoon mustered up all the courage he could to fight the anxiety building up in him. "Dreams..." He attempted, voice hoarse from lack of use, this was going to be the first sentence he would say to Seungcheol and he was going to make sure it swayed his thoughts towards him. "Dreams are for sleepers." this was a reference to Seungcheol's insomnia induced, thought ridden sleepless nights. "But you're a believer - not a dreamer." Jihoon allowed his smile to expand to his eyes, tears brewing in his own brown eyes now, the statement wasn't meant to be something rude or hurtful. The statement meant that Seungcheol didn't need to dream any longer about a future he wanted but couldn't have - Jihoon was here now and everything was going to be ok, he just needed to convert those dreams of happy times into beliefs about moving forward and changing his lifeless future into something bright, colourful and vibrant.

 Seungcheol smiled, genuine and bright. "Tomorrow, Jihoon, we feast like kings."


End file.
